Since I began tracking numbers (earlier this year) this site has recieved:

5,030 page loads, 3,373 unique visitors, 2,841 first time visitors, and 532 returning visitors

I'm thankful for every person who lands on this site and I hope it is useful to you. Folks who land here by-in-large tend not to comment on the posts. That's ok.

Some plans for the new year:
finish my friend Glenn's book. Work some more on my memoirs. Interact with other folks who might be able to help me with my memoir. Start a new blog on Hard-living music, people, and faith.

new acquisitions

Two of my favorite hobbies are reading and music. Here is list of new acquisitions in the last few weeks.

Books:
Billy Joe Shaver: Honky Tonk Hero, University of Texas Press, 2005. (Devoured in one day.)
Waiting for the Word: Dietrich Bonhoeffer on Speaking About God by Fritz Delange, Eerdmans, 2000. (Nibbling my way through. Found for $5 on Abebooks! Bought because of Richard Gillingham's review.)
Karl Barth Letters 1961-1968, translated by G. Bromily (Found at a local used bookstore for $5.50. A delight!)

On the music side:
Rosanne Cash "Black Cadillac"
Johnny Cash At San Quentin (The Legacy Edition) This box set has the complete uncut concert on two CDs and a BBC documentary (51 minutes) on another DVD. This DVD is well worth it all. I've watched it twice now and will have to watch it many more with other friends. Saw it with my parents and grandparents the other night and we were all amazed that it took so long for it to be released. If you have the album but haven't seen the documentary, crucial audio parts come alive. So cool.
Drive-By Truckers "Decoration Day" and "A Blessing and A Curse" (Last two albums.)

It generally takes me much more time to devour music than books. Often I'm listening and reading at the same time. But good music has to slip into my subconscious and then my blood stream before I make a judgment on it.

zombies in the Bible?

There are zombies in the Bible! You heard it here first.

Tags: zombies, the Bible

On listening to preaching

Kim Fabricius (male expat New Yorker in the UK) has a great post titled "9.5 Theses on Listening to Preaching." He weaves theological concepts throughout in a very inviting way. I would venture to say most untheological folk won't get most of them. I only got one because of Bonhoeffer, theologia crucis. Wish I'd seen this before I'd posted my "looking for a church and finding a family." But then if I had answers before I had questions I'd never think to ask right?

Warm Memories of Dr. Vernon Purdy

An old friend passed away on December 5th. Dr. Vernon Purdy had a profound impact on my life and I will miss him. I found his obituary here in the archives of the Springfield News-Leader. Please pray for his family, particularly his wife Naomi and his daughter Carissa and son Caleb. He was only 48 years old. The obituary did not mention a cause of death. I learned so much about the horizons of faith from Dr. Purdy. His kindness, friendship, and encouragement demonstrated a true walk of faith to me. Vernon Purdy joins the cloud of witnesses across time. Thanks Old Friend.

Tags: Dr. Vernon Purdy, Obituary, faith

another post no one will ever read

Well I don't know if its appropriate to blog about this on Christmas Day. Is it appropriate to do anything on Christmas Day aside from opening presents, eating and laying around? Well I'm blogging and the rest of my family are cleaning because a guest is coming tonight. I already did my share. On play right now are Carl Perkins, The Statler Bros. and the Carter Family all opening for Johnny Cash at San Quentin (the Legacy Edition).

My daily morning devotions this year have consisted of the following readings: Twenty-Four Hours A Day for Everyone, compiled by Alan L. Roeck, Sieze the Day with Dietrich Bonhoeffer by Charles Ringma (and I use the REB for looking up the scripture references) and then I follow it all up with The One Year Bible (NLT) from Tyndale. Since November 1^st this Bible has had me reading through the prophets Ezekial, Daniel, Joel, Amos, Obadiah, Jonah, Micah, Nahum, Habakkuk, Zephaniah, Haggai, and right now I’m in Zechariah. By the first of the year I will have read through the entire Old Testament. I guess that’s something to be proud of.

Well far from feeling proud about it, reading all these prophets has left me bewildered. I read them, then some of the New Testament, the Psalms, and Proverbs as part of this reading. I can usually barely get past the prophetic desire for blood and vengeance to enjoy the NT readings and then so many of the Psalms themselves are so bloody that the verse of Proverbs at the end is usually some really funny and quizzical comical relief. Here’s this morning’s Proverb for Christmas Day(!):

There are three stately monarchs on the earth---no, four: the lion, king of animals, who won’t turn aside for anything, the strutting rooster, the male goat, a king as he leads his army. (30:29-31)

These are all lovely symbols of male testosterone in action. So what am I supposed to do with that? So my final devotional thought was of how George W. Bush must feel when he leads his army into battle. Oh, wait, that’s right. He only visits Iraq and Afghanistan occasionally. So in his morning telecommuniques he must feel really proud sitting in his chair, knowing the movements of every battalion. That’s a biblical image, you know. But what am I supposed to do with that?

Here are some thoughts about these OT prophets: I have done some Bible college study in the Prophets so I have at least an entrance knowledge into their history and issues. But when I’m reading them in this way in the mornings I feel at a loss. I fear I don’t give them the kind of attention they deserve. What I really need to do is go back and study these books in their given time period together and apart. I enjoy Lamentations, Ezekial and Daniel as historical books. What I find troubling are the visions left uninterpreted, like the measuring of the New Heavens, the scroll eating, and the apocalyptic slaughters. Together with the New Testament book of Revelation they don’t make for fun reading to me. I guess they’re meant to be jarring and frightening. The prophets themselves (who are part of the vision) are physically shaken. It takes work to get through them and it doesn’t “bless my spirit.” I don’t even want to get into the various ways these things are interpreted and I certainly don’t want to deal with them in my morning meditation.

Let me ask very brazenly:

Who is this God who imparts troubling passages to us as Eternal Scripture, leaves an imperfect record of the people who receive this word and what they did with it, and is content with our new conversations and questions left unanswered? How is He so patient, attentive, active and yet content? Finally, how do I fit my own boring self, awake in a warm Midwestern house, overpowered right now by Manheim Steamroller playing next to me, and the sounds of my children’s new toys piercing the air, into this Biblical record? Can these be reconciled?

These are some thoughts on Christmas Day. This old quote from Mark Twain would fit right now:

"It ain't the parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts that I do understand."
(Mark Twain / 1835-1910 / in The "Wit and Wisdom, of Mark Twain of Alex Ayres / 1987)

When I hear preachers quote that it always makes me smile. Samuel Clemens had much more to say about the Bible beyond that. And the preacher is generally using that quote in a self-serving way. When I hear it quoted he’s trying to say “We don’t have to understand the Bible to be effected by it.” Yeh, so what? Here’s another quote from Clemens on the Bible:

"Our Bible reveals to us the character of our god with minute and remorseless exactness... It is perhaps the most damnatory biography that exists in print anywhere. It makes Nero an angel of light and leading by contrast"
(Mark Twain / 1835-1910 / Reflections on Religion / 1906)

or try this one on:

"[The Bible] has noble poetry in it... and some good morals and a wealth of obscenity, and upwards of a thousand lies."
(Mark Twain / 1835-1910)

or this one:

"There is one notable thing about our Christianity: bad, bloody, merciless, money-grabbing and predatory as it is -- in our country particularly, and in all other Christian countries in a somewhat modified degree -- it is still a hundred times better than the Christianity of the Bible, with its prodigious crime -- the invention of Hell. Measured by our Christianity of to-day, bad as it is, hypocritical as it is, empty and hollow as it is, neither the Deity nor His Son is a Christian, nor qualified for that moderately high place. Ours is a terrible religion. The fleets of the world could swim in spacious comfort in the innocent blood it has spilt."
(Mark Twain / 1835-1910 / Reflections on Religion / 1906)

Wow. If I can’t say anything else for him, ole Mark Twain was certainly candid. I don’t agree with much of any of that last quote. [When anyone attacks Christianity my first question is "So what do you mean by "Christianity" and what do you mean by "religion" and what do you mean by "faith"?"] Really, to me, the rewards and punishments for the wicked are not as bad as the apocalypse scenarios which remain without historical interpretation.
Well, Merry Christmas.

Me on Television

Well, if you've found this blog because you saw me on NLEC's Telethons: welcome! I hope my singing and playing were not too painful an experience for you. Then again, whatever it takes to get you here! Because I care about fairness, here are the artist's songs that I did and the albums where you can find these songs. I'm sure you'll find their versions much more appealing.

Johnny Cash: Personal File and American V: A Hundred Highways

Iris Dement: Lifeline

Billy Joe Shaver: Victory

I also taped a show with my dad to be aired after Christmas where we discussed the medium of Television, Media Ecology, the movie "Good Night and Good Luck" and I'm pretty sure I mentioned Jacque Ellul's book The Humiliation of the Word. Dad says he thinks most of his audience are as computer illiterate as he is, but on the slim chance that you find this blog as a result of this program: Welcome!

On Looking for a church and Finding a Family

On Looking for a church and Finding a Family

One of the big prayers we had for this trip to visit my mom was that the Lord would direct us to a church that really embodied the Word of God in word and deed. I asked our home family at JPUSA to pray that for us too. We were looking for a church with a good Sunday school for our kids, for a worship we could relate to and an order of service rooted in the church across time---catholicity. I’ve been using the Book of Common Prayer for years and Martha has gotten into praying the hours of the Shorter Christian Prayer. I knew that to find that kind of thing we’d have to venture way beyond our usual circles into new territory.

This was a fearful thing to me. I hate being a church shopper. It doesn’t make sense. First off we don’t think of the church as an entertainment center with us as its center. We think of the church as family that gathers with Christ as the center. Further, it’s a family that serves as Jesus leads. So the idea of looking for a family to adopt us for six short weeks seemed a little unfair, to both us and to them. Here we are as a family of five, essentially asking some larger family to accept us for only six weeks, meet our spiritual needs and then let us go. There seemed to be a lot of obstacles to that happening. So I set my expectations low.

The final hurdle for me was the highest one, I thought. I was afraid of extra biblical, cultural sermons that might manipulate and wound me. I like to think I’m not a terribly critical person, or too picky, a preacher snob. I’m a musical snob, but I’d like to think my snobbery doesn’t extend to speech. I’d like to think I have a high tolerance for all styles and manner of speech, from Black gospel preaching to White, square, straight homilies. But truthfully I’ve grown allergic to the following:

--“clothes line sermons” (about girls’ hemlines and necklines these days),

--hellfire and heaven sureties,

--demons waiting to pounce on unsuspecting TV viewers

--sermons that gleefully await the end of the world and see the deaths of entire scores of the heathen as signposts and proof of some Millerite timeline.

These send me into a fight or flight reflex that says “run for the door or publicly challenge this!” I’ve never done the latter in church and I rarely actually run for the door. I just feel hurt and my wife hears me rant the rest of the day.

I promise this won't turn into a Mystery Worshipper situation, here’s our recent story:

The first church we visited (which shall remain nameless) had some very friendly folk. Warm handshakes all around, hugs and kindness. Good daycare program. When I dropped off our older kids upstairs for children’s church I immediately noticed a large TV on the side where the kids were already playing PS2. Later, after the service, my son just glowed with his new experience. Salvation?

“Dad, they gave us these gold (colored) tokens and said that next week we could cash them in for prizes like candy or toys!”

Well, that didn’t thrill me.

“So what did you learn?”

“Uh. . . they called us together to sing songs and memorize verses and then I went back to playing ‘Crash Bandicoot’.”

Shocked, I verified the facts.

“So, what amount of time would you say you played PS2?”

“I don’t know. . . . but for most of it!”

That sold me, we weren’t going back there! Well, no, that wasn’t the only thing.

Before beginning the sermon, the pastor opened with a film illustrating how we’re all like high school teenagers bound by sin with handcuffs, ball and chain, and even stocks(!) until we go to the “Kingdom Van” out behind the school to get freed. The trouble was, the presentation had a glitch just as the kids got to the van. Suddenly, we were forced to use our imaginations to experience the outcome. Couldn’t we have done that without the video at all?

The sermon was titled “unbinding Jesus’ hands” or something like that. I understood the gist of what he was saying and was willing to bear with the lengthy exposition of Jesus before Pilate with numerous illustrations (out of context) finishing with Seven Sins We Commit that Tie Jesus Hands. But when we were led in a “repeat after me” prayer where we said “I’m sorry for binding your hands Jesus,” I had to fight hard not to burst out laughing at the absurdity of imagining the Almighty Glorified Son of God bound by some child’s disobedience. Where, using the Bible, Church History, or daily experience could we find a reason to think that the Lord Jesus is still bound every time we sin? So why base a sermon on that illustration, print 300 programs with the title, and make us all fools by having us confess in prayer to something that can’t possibly be true?

It makes me think of a photo of a church sign I saw that said “God Wants You to Kill Your Old Man.” Terribly unfortunate idea for a sign. I hope to God no one took it literally. The Headlines would read “Church Sign Causes Rash of Paternal Homicides!”

After feeling this way about the first church, I began to doubt whether any church would meet my standards. I didn’t want to be too exacting. After all, as the old saying goes “if you find the perfect church, don’t join or you’ll ruin it!” I guess that’s a take off on the old Groucho Marx line “I would never join a club that would have me for a member.”

So I decided to just ditch my list of qualifications and attend the next service in faith that God would take care of us. I looked on the internet for a list of ELCA (Evangelical Lutheran Church in America) churches in the Springfield area. Found out that one had a contemporary worship at the same time as Sunday school, called the office to double check, and then the following Sunday showed up! Well, it was everything we could have wanted and more! Very organized, not too formal, great Sunday School for the kids, a simple liturgy honoring the Church Year, a good sermon that didn’t upstage everything else, and a nice praise band.

The coolest thing was the eagerness with which we were invited to help out. We were brand new, and explained that we’d only be in town for six weeks, but that didn’t stop anyone from wanting to know us and have us as part of their activities. Far from playing PS2, this time the kids were rehearsing a Christmas Program. When we picked them up they begged and pleaded to be able to join. Two other kids had gotten sick so a script and list of songs was thrust on them with the invitation to practice twice weekly for two hours at a time in expectation of the coming event. Wow. We were hesitant at first, but the play leader announced that she was also new but eager to help. So with the sounds of “O Tanenbaum” in a not-quite-ready-but-loud key resounding from our kids in the back seat, we joyfully drove home.

The following Sunday morning after the service I walked up to the lead electric guitar player to compliment the music. I mentioned specifically the nice western licks I heard, and that I was into the Austin sound from the 70s. He asked, “Are you a guitar player?”

“Well yeh, I play a Martin” I said. So he said, “I’m always looking for another player so I can sit out some parts.”

“Well, I don’t know, we’re only here a few more weeks.” But then I looked up and noticed another woman from the band listening in. “Here at Messiah we put you to work” she said with a smile.

I liked that. I was reminded that that’s what community is all about. Being volunteered. It draws me in, makes me feel a part. “Well, I’ll talk to my family.”

“Great, if you can do it be here at five on Wednesday for practice.”

“Ok. I just might be!”

I was kind of torn. I’m down here because I’m not so sure how much time I have left with mom. What will she think if I just disappear on her on Wednesday night? But this was meeting another need in my life. I had this dream of hooking up with a band and playing some licks down here---for the fellowship. That’s why I play music, not to be the center of attention but to belong and make something bigger than myself. So I went to mom and asked if it was ok with her. We agreed to play it by ear on a see if it fits on a weekly basis.

So for that Wednesday it worked. I went and had a great time. The whole practice was very relaxed. On at least one song we winged the whole thing and had fun when we messed up. No pressure, just great fun. After practice there was a little dinner and conversation. There’s always something happening at this church. So many ways to get involved: Al-Anon meetings, Hand bells, Hospital service opportunities. This, in my book, is a church that works. It supports itself and it reaches out of itself. Its messy at times and neat at other times. I’m sure its as imperfect as any other church family(and truthfully we won’t be around long enough to know to what extent). . . .just like my own up in Chicago.

In my meditation this morning, I read the following from Charles Ringma:

“Commitment is won through the struggle of working through options. Obedience comes through laying down our lives. Power results from true servant hood. And love needs to be imparted to us. Nothing good simply falls into our lap. Good comes when evil and selfishness are resisted and God’s grace and direction is grasped with both hands.”

---from Dec. 20, Sieze the Day with Dietrich Bonhoeffer by Charles Ringma, Pinon, 2000. [My copy is especially precious because it bears the coffee spillage of my friends Jon and Carol Trott back at JPUSA where I “gave” it to them for Christmas last year. They “gave” it back to me this year.]

That quote seems to draw in everything I’ve experienced in this whole church-search-journey thing over the last month. There are many things that can stand in the way of finding a good church. I would be remiss not to add that God has done a great work in me personally over the last year that has given me the confidence to speak up and introduce myself to people, the desire to know new names and faces, and the sincere love for life that affords relationships. Only last year I would not have been so bold, so precocious, so at ease in conversations. I still have a long way to go, but at one time the thought of connecting with a new church would have been literally paralyzing.

In 2003 I worked as an editor on a book about a man with "church paralysis." For all of his adult life he could not bring himself to reconcile his faith with a particular house of worship. Granted, there were a lot of extenuating circumstances. But he was never able to break through his fears and vulnerability to believe that a particular church of people could meet his needs and use his services. I know that God still used him, but he serves as an example to me of what I could easily become: full of denial, fear, anger and finally ambivalence.

Regardless of what I’ve written about the theological pet peeves and excesses I see and hear from pulpits, I believe in the power of the local church. Here we encounter all that is peculiar about America’s way of being religious. But here we also encounter and are changed by the Spirit of God if we’re willing. This is the story of how God met my family’s particular needs this year. Your story would no doubt look different depending on you and your family’s needs. Maybe you’d end up at the very church I couldn’t stand and have an entirely different story to tell. That’s OK. Just pray for the willingness, which, as the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions puts it, is a key.

“Once unlocked by willingness, the door opens almost of itself, and looking through it, we shall see a pathway beside which is an inscription. It reads: “This is the way to a faith that works.”

If I had an End of the Year Benediction it would be this: If you haven't yet, may you too find that Willingness now, and once you find it keep going! Staying on the path is different than just visiting. What this experience has taught me is that God answers prayer, especially when that prayer involves a willingness to act. If we were staying here in Springfield that would involve continually coming back, continually offering ourselves, and continually making ourselves vulnerable to receive.

If you’re ever in the Springfield Missouri area, I do recommend the church family of Messiah Lutheran, 925 E. Seminole.

The Kingdom work for the poor and the Parable of the Soils

My dad called me this morning and we talked about things that happend at the Free Store last night. I was rather dismayed to hear that my friend Eddy, who’d been playing guitar, had a bit of a violent blow out and the police were called. I was saddened, but I’m never altogether taken by surprise. Maybe sometimes I sound a bit Pollyannaish when I describe the Free Store, as though I only expect the best from our experiences and sobriety and rationality from each day forward from these folks I call friends. Well, if you read further than the first page of this blog, you should know that’s not true. I grew up in this work. I’ve known a lot of heartache from the many friends who’ve come and gone, many of whom died later as a result of their life choices. Today I did this little study as a reminder to myself of what it is I’m involved in and why. I hope you find it helpful as well:

Ministry of good news to the poor is, in essence, a work of the Kingdom of God. Now in this work, just as in the parable of the soils in Mark 4:1-20, the good news of the kingdom does not always meet with good result. In this story the sower casts his seed for all the soil. In our work of spreading good news to the poor we will often meet with stolen, sun scorched and thistle choked results. The soil is not always ready but we must remember that the sower is always impartial. God’s Grace often seems misplaced in us human beings. I’ve been writing lately about men on Commercial Street in Springfield without ID, many with the disease of alcoholism, mental illness or drug addiction. Now many would say that these poor are used up soil who no longer have a place for the seed of the Kingdom. But the Scriptures indicate that the poor are a crucial part of God’s Kingdom and that ministry to them gives us a glimpse into God’s new order of things. (Luke 1:52-53; James 2:5)

For those of us called to this Kingdom work, God’s law of liberty (James 2:12-26) serves as our manner of speech and action. This new law does not judge a person by how often they fail, by their psychological type, their medical history, their credit record, or their family history. This new life-giving law says that we should regard no one from a human point of view but rather as the new creation they are becoming in Christ, where the old is passed, the new is come, and where we are ambassadors of Christ for reconciliation. This is what is truly odd about the Free Store in Springfield. The Free Store is a small space where persons from any walk of life can gather and experience what the Kingdom of God might look like. Now in my experience in this Kingdom, what is different about it is that the free space fills with all sorts of ugly, human, and messy things. The carpets are soiled. The furniture is broken. It’s a free work and the money is spent on food and keeping the lights on. If it’s true that cleanliness is next to godliness, than this kind of Kingdom space might not look so godly on a given night. The guests were all beckoned from the highways and byways! (Mt. 22:9-10) But looks are not what we’re after here. We’re talking about the promise of being new people!

What I find beautiful about this parable of the soil is with what complete abandon the sower spreads his seed. By some standards it is careless, disregarding economy or even ergonomics. Why waste seed in places where it won’t grow? Its impractical, even insensible. But this is the Kingdom! No expense is spared within the possibility that here too in the darkest, rockiest, and thorniest places the Kingdom might flourish. As long as we have breath in our bodies and blood in our veins we do not lie beyond the grace of God. We must believe this, because this gospel was freely preached to us! If we know ourselves rightly, we know that God’s work in us does not cease after we agree that it begin. There is still thorny ground in all of us. The parable of the Wheat and the Tares reminds us that the enemy has sown weeds even in the good crop and that only in the End will God’s Harvest be revealed.

Tags: Mark 4:1-20, Kingdom of God, parables, Jesus, homelessness, alcoholism, addiction, hope

Frank's response to the News-Leader article

Frank was one of the homeless men interviewed for the Springfield News-Leader article last week. Here is some of his response to her article: [12/15, After consulting with Frank and my dad, I have edited this down to just a few of Frank's sentiments. Not everything needs archiving on this blog. Since all this happened, the police have been much more agreeable and helpful. The weather has warmed up considerably and that helps too.]

. . . . that it is also a violation according to the local police for a homeless person to walk, stand or sit on a street corner or in the alleys. It is also a violation to say in the city parks, bus stops or (according to the police) anywhere in the Springfield City Limits. I also said that I have not mastered levitation yet. I wish I could so I wouldn’t be breaking any laws.

“There are life safety issues.”

Yes, and that is why Rev. Rice is trying to save some lives. It is too late for our buddy Mike who died last week in an abandoned house from alcohol poisoning only in his mid-30s. Rev. Rice as we all feel guilty that he could not reach the safety of the FREE STORE. I’m not sure why you failed to write these facts down as we spilled our hearts out to you, assuming that you had compassion and sincere concern for the homeless.

Lincoln once said, “Those who are willing to give up their freedom for their safety do not deserve either one.” I love this country and paid a great sacrifice. I have lived here for more than a quarter century and the longer I live here the more it reminds me of the same place I have escaped from. Obviously I could not be a News reporter as my personal dignity is more than a job. No wonder that I’m still homeless.

Thank You, Frank.

This letter reflects the reality of the situation from the point of view of someone living it. Many people in Springfield are saying "There are plenty of shelters. This city works." But Frank tells us what he knows from having sought help at each one. I keep thinking there's got to be an easy way to survey this whole situation, talk to all parties involved, sit down with the city officials and find out how they thought this law would help anyone. What that assumes is that people want to talk, listen, and act. Let's pray that happens.

Tags: Springfield News-Leader, Springfield Missouri, homeless, cold, shelter, zoning

Friday night at the Free Store

I played and sang at the Free Store again last night. There were like twice the usual number of friends. A nice family brought food so the atmosphere was a bit different. I was really nervous at first and totally flopped on the first song "Unchained." Oh well. They were all busy eating and talking. So I just smiled, apologized for butchering Johnny Cash, and moved into the next song. It was fun. After singing "Palms of Victory," the spirit struck dad and he launched into a small sermon on not giving up. Way cool. Then I did Lucinda Williams' song "I Lost It." I asked first if anyone had heard of Lucinda Williams. No takers so I mentioned that that was good because then they won't know what they're missing. My friends here were so nice to me. No food was thrown. I actually got small rounds of applause.

After a while I sat down to talk to Frank Zubek. I handed my guitar to Eddie and he picked up my Mel Bay songbook of old hymns and did three or four songs. I think he's a much better singer. Frank and I talked about what doing a book would look like and he asked if I could just help him do a brochure to go with his product. Of course. He handed me a letter he'd written to the reporter in response to her article and asked if I'd correct it. So I did it this morning. He's such a wit, I'll tell you. If he doesn't mind I'd like to reprint some of it here in another post.

Update on civil disobedience in Springfield

The Springfield News-Leader ran a front page story this morning on dad's civil disobedience and the emergency housing situation in Springfield. Jane Huh's story is titled: "Homeless advocate challenges city again." It has some nice pictures and is mostly positive. Its interesting to read the comments from Springfieldians. My favorite is "Jesus must be crying because of the publicity given to this false teacher."
I'll be joining my dad for another meeting at the Free Store tonight. Frank Zubek, a homeless friend who was mentioned and pictured in the article, is pending a patent for a game he calls the "Elusive Cube." He has quite a brain for math and geometry. He's very interested in publishing a book and I'm offering to help him with that idea. Pray for him. Life on the streets is unkind to anyone. He travels back and forth between Oklahoma City. Pray for his safety.

Tags: Frank Zubek, homelessness, Elusive Cube, Springfield News-Leader, Larry Rice

illegally sheltering the homeless in the Buckle of the Bible Belt

This week has been quite exciting. My dad and I have been meeting with homeless men and women at the New Life Free Store on Commercial Street in Springfield Missouri. Far from being an official church service or Bible study, we sit on old chairs or the carpet and just talk about what’s been going on in our lives. We ask to hear their stories about just making it day to day on the streets. The openness and eagerness is so refreshing. Since the spring I’ve been repeatedly listening to about twenty songs by Johnny Cash, many old folk songs like “Palms of Victory” and “Kneeling Drunkards Plea,” some new like “The Beast in Me” and “Unchained.” What I’ve been hearing is the universal human experience of failure and desperation, of confession and forgiveness, of hope and healing and a future. Before heading down to Springfield I gathered the lyrics to many of these songs. I didn’t really know what for. I dug them out and sang them with my new friends at this meeting. The effect on me personally to share these songs was staggering. I’ve shared here before that I’ve been involved in twelve step recovery for a few years now. These songs speak to so much of what I’ve learned from my group. During the last meeting I met a man, Eddie, who had played lead guitar in a band sometime ago. Eddie was honest that he’d had a few drinks before the meeting. He wanted to get sober, we talked about it several times. Eddie sprung right into “I Saw the Light” and he knew more of the lyrics than I did.

I get so much out of these kind of friendships. Its hard to believe that a place like this, a shelter from the extreme cold, could be illegal. Its even harder to believe that its illegal in a small city that has so many Bible colleges, churches, and church headquarters such as the Assemblies of God and the Baptist Bible Fellowship. But its true. The only way we meet in this warm place and then let these folks sleep overnight is in direct violation of a city ordinance that says that emergency shelters may not be within a certain number of feet from one another. The city argues that it doesn’t need any more homeless shelters and that this ordinance helps keep the homeless population under control. So in essence, if someone is slightly intoxicated or without ID they’re just SOL. They can’t be on the street but they can’t be “illegally” housed either. In addition, police have been harassing the homeless, trying to catch them jay walking, threatening arrest just for walking around. Many folks have stories of their camps in the woods being discovered and their belonging destroyed. The other night staff at the Free Store were visited three times by policemen and finally threatened with arrest for taking in homeless people. So, my dad (Rev. Larry Rice) had had enough. The next day (yesterday) he called a press conference to admit that they were indeed sheltering the homeless (it had been an open secret) and that they would continue it. Further, after the Press Conference he and the homeless marched down to the police station and he met with the highest ranking officer on duty to turn himself in. “Don’t arrest the staff,” he said, “arrest me.”

Frank Lockwood of Bible Belt Blogger covers the story in his post: "Pastor: I'll help the homeless 'til police arrest me." He wasn’t arrested at the station, they were very kind and helpful. An officer with internal affairs said to forward any more reports of harassment to him personally. This was far better than expected. A reporter from the Springfield NewsLeader was there taking notes. But of course, this isn’t the end. The zoning law remains the same. In truth this battle has been on in different ways for the last five years. New Life was recently given the Social Security Building in Springfield by the federal government. It just so happens to be located within 2000 feet of another emergency shelter. Here’s the Press Release as issued yesterday. I’ll try to keep you posted on the situation as it develops.

PRESS CONFERENCE
TODAY, DECEMBER 6TH AT 2PM
209 W. COMMERCIAL
SPRINGFIELD, MO

Larry Rice is willing to be arrested by Springfield police for sheltering the Springfield homeless during the extreme cold temperatures. At the press conference he will explain how New Life Evangelistic Center Free Store and Church has been providing sanctuary to the homeless who would otherwise sleep outside.

Yesterday, the NLEC staff on location were visited three times by Springfield Police Officer Steve Miller, who told them they could not operate a shelter due to zoning ordinances (but at night it is the Springfield Police who call NLEC to give shelter to the homeless, including a 70 year old veteran). On his third visit to NLEC, Officer Miller threatened to arrest any of the NLEC staff who were providing shelter.

Rev. Rice will explain how and where he has been hiding the Springfield homeless during the severe cold weather. Because of Springfield’s repressive law requiring services for the homeless to be 2000 feet away from each other, Rev. Rice’s activities to help them at 209 W. Commercial have been declared illegal.

Following the Press Conference, Larry Rice will march with the homeless to the Police Station to turn himself in. If he is arrested, he promises that once he is released, he will be right back at 209 W. Commercial, sheltering the homeless in obedience to Jesus’ teaching in Matthew 25. If he is not arrested, he will be sleeping at the shelter with the homeless tonight.

Also during the Press Conference, Rev. Rice will be calling on the clergy of Springfield to join him in taking a stand this Christmas and open their churches to help the homeless as Jesus taught. In addition, an update will be given on the use of the Social Security Building, which has been given to NLEC to help homeless veterans in 2007.

Blogging Bethge's Bonhoeffer Chapter Nine "Preacher's Seminary: 1935"

Eberhard Bethge, Chapter Nine "Preacher's Seminary: 1935" pgs. 419-491

I feel like I've been over Chapter Nine before. I prepared a paper for the Cornerstone Mag website in March of 2005 titled "Dietrich Bonhoeffer as we understand him at Jesus People Covenant Church." For that paper I used chapter nine and Craig Slane's "Bonhoeffer as Martyr" as key resources in understanding the importance of the Finkenwalde period on Bonhoeffer. So when I looked again at my blogging, I was startled and a bit dismayed that I hadn't really blogged it before! Because of all this previous work, and because I've been reading further than I've been blogging, I honestly thought I was up to Chapter 10.

Eberhard Bethge writes that "Bonhoeffer had reflected about community life for four years now; now he could put his ideas into practice." (pg. 419) We've already noted to what length Bonhoeffer researched his interest in community. He visited several communities in England to get ideas. There is more background info on these visits from friends who were there in the little book, I Knew Dietrich Bonhoeffer. It is important to recognize what he had in mind here. He had always loved the sacraments, the monastic orders, the hymns, and the Scriptures. With his students from Berlin I made note that he had already adopted a sort of communal identity. In this chapter Bethge heavily weighs in the political and academic elements involved. Only in the sections "Finkenwalde" (425-440) and "The House of Brethren" (460-472) does he directly treat in detail the communal life and activity. While I intend to blog Bethge as it is written, I want to say straight out that I find the method he employs of chronicling this period quite frustrating! Chapters nine and ten represent what I consider to be the most interesting period in Bonhoeffer's life. Eberhard Bethge was a student at this time and became Bonhoeffer's friend around this time. These two chapters represent almost 1/6th of the overall content of the entire book (167 of 933 pgs). It is disheartening to me that in these two chapters there is far less personal narrative of the Finkenwalde community than there is a laboring description of the larger church, political, and ecumenical times and their effects. I understand that the brief Finkenwalde experiment is really only a small part of Dietrich's story, but I wish that it were written more linear here. As it is, I feel like I have to dissect the material from the larger work and then piece it together to understand it. The index in the back is little help. In short, concentrating on Finkenwalde in the two chapters that cover it, is hard work!

The Seminary among the Seminaries (419-424)
In many ways this was a doomed project from the start. The state of the Confessing Church was beyond question in peril. This seminary was conceived to meet a need within an emergency situation. By all accounts it was an attempt to rescue a new kind of ministry to a Church at odds within itself.

State Church policies (421)
The German Church and Confessing Church were coming under the complete financial control of the Nazi government. The fate of the Seminary's governing body- the Old Prussian Union- was uncertain. Bethge takes up these policies again in chapter ten on page 493.

It is here, at the beginning, that I think some of my pacifist friends who sympathize with Bonhoeffer's communal impulse should look. He is already too tied into the State by virtue of his active ecclesial and political actions. His criticism of the state and even of the Confessing Church's path are not enough. One friend claimed that Andre Trocme and his congregation in the village of Le Chambon-sur-Lignon rather than Finkenwalde was our model of a faith embodied community. (I guess this german lutheran was too german for us today, too lutheran, and cared too much about his church!) I have heard the charge that Bonhoeffer's community failed to foster the kind of spirituality that could stand against the Nazi state. Further, his decision to join the Abwehr resistance finally severed him from his peace activities and signaled an abandonment of the Church. I think this judgment does not take into account Bethge's detailed documentation of Bonhoeffer's work within the Church struggle. At every turn up to 1935, Dietrich has worked within the Confessing Church for an embodied ecclesiology wherein the Church would truly act as Christ's body toward the State. Up to 1935 most of what he wrote concerning this was for ecumenical gatherings, theological journals, and pastoral leagues. With this new seminary he would finally be training and modeling this ecclesiology for pastors-to-be.

There's not time here for a full comparison between Trocme and Bonhoeffer, but two things are readily apparent. Trocme is a French Hugenot who began sheltering Jews in 1942. That's rather late in the game compared to Bonhoeffer. Secondly, while France was under German Military Occupation in 1942, is it really fair to compare a French Hugenot congregation to a German Lutheran one? What did each man have to work with? I think it is far better to say that each faith community had its own story of sin and obedience for the decisions they were given. It is clear that Bonhoeffer's legacy involved a discipleship that fostered the Church through to the post world war era.


Bethge takes us month by month through the drastic changes that effect the Old Prussian Union within the Confessing church. In March of 1935 the Prussian state government set up a finance department allegedly to protect property and charities, but aparently to bring the churches under state jurisdiction. In June the Legislative Authority is set up to stop Confessing church appeals to the regular courts. In July the Ministry of Church Affairs comes under the leadersthip of Hanns Kerrl. The "Law for the Protection of the German Evangelical Church" is set up. Seventeen clauses led to the disintegration of the Confessing church by creating irreparable schisms among its membership.

Bethge writes:

Thus the year in which Bonhoeffer's seminary was founded was also one of fundamental changes in the course of the church struggle. The previous resistance against the German Christians and their methods now seemed simple by comparison. That resistance had never lost a certain vigor and joy, and it had given the old concept of heresy a new lease on life. Now, however, the issue was whether to directly oppose thte state and disobey its laws. . . . Things now became far more dangerous and insidious, for the regime had discovered its opponent's weak spot. (p. 422)

At this point, in his discussion of the Old Prussian Seminaries, (423) Bethge compares the two kinds of churches within the Confessing church as "intact" and "destroyed." Destroyed churches were ones in which German Christians had gained enough power to disrupt the Confessing influence. In these churches "emergency" administrations had to be set up to counteract the German Christians. So the bitterness is very real. Lutherans call Confessing members "Dahlemites" (radical fanatics) and Confessing members deny the German Christians the right to call themselves "confessing" at all.

Within all this Bonhoeffer is commissioned to direct a seminary for these "fanatics" to train new pastors. He remained official capacity until the day he was executed in 1945. Bethge tells us that Wilhem Rott, named as Dietrich's assistant director, "adhered to the principle that 'of course things could be done another way.'" They had a "magnamimous" relationship that complimented each others' authority. This is a little window for us into the authority structure at Finkenwalde. The majority of students came from Dietrich's old teaching area of Berlin-Brandenburg (urban area), but some were from Saxony (rural area)--including a young Eberhard Bethge himself. These Saxons were expelled from the Wittenburg seminary by the Reich bishop for refusing to obey Ludwig Muller's church government authority. (Finkenwalde is the first stop on the main railway line from Stettin to the east,(425) is the site of another private school that had met National Socialist disfavor, and they invite in just-expelled students! How's that for laying low from the Gestapo?! Something bad is bound to happen, and they all know it.)

The location of the seminary at Zingst was only 100 yards from the beach and the dunes. We should not overlook this little community's affection for nature. In May when the sun was warm enough Bonhoeffer would take the students outside for their discussion or to sing in choral rounds. I think I have more of a personal fondness for this section of chapter nine (pgs. 426-433) than any other. Beginning with the students' appeal for funds in poetry, to the miraculous permit for the slaughter of a pig, to the ways they decorated and furnished the rooms and finally the way Bonhoeffer gave his own beloved library or very valuable books (428)--never to see them all in one place again(!)--the prose here is magnificent! I can't help but feel like the reading here has a holy effect on me. Granted, I always love biographies of community, but here we have described the way in which an Ekklesia (called out people) lived to be different. Their activities were desperate and dangerous and very different from the way most Germans understood the church. That is special, and dare I say, makes for holy reading!
In the description of Dietrich's daily working routine we find that he had his students read biographies aloud during their evening meal (429). This importance ascribed to biography makes me wonder aloud whether the reading of Bonhoeffer's biography itself places us as readers into some special communion of saints.

I love it when I read that not all of Bonhoeffer's ideas met with success. When Bethge says that something met with insurmountable opposition, it says something about Bonhoeffer's personality. He was not so domineering that the students' opinions did not count. As he did with the teenagers in the youth clubs years before, Bonhoeffer found creative ways of leading by example, by telling stories, by winsome descriptions rather than loud and direct orders. Which is not to say there weren't heated arguments. It seems to me that every member of this little seminary was seen to count. Entrance and exit mattered. No one was shunned or excluded. When crucial differences arose over important issues (like a sympathy for the National Socialist positions) the pain of difference was very real. I expect to revisit that in chapter ten.

Music was so important to Bonhoeffer. Bethge writes:

"His love of making music was truly impressive, whether he was persuaded to perform for the others or was inspired to explore musical areas hitherto unknown to him. His romantic heritage was strongly evident in his playing of Chopin, Brahms, and excerpts from the delightfully stylish Rosenkavalier. But he never turned down a request to join in playing one of Bach's concertos for two pianos. . . . All this was clearly part of the practice of communal living and the personal training of future preachers; it occurred more through indirect suggestions than explicit words."

I've heard Dietrich described as "hopelessly inaccessible" because of his assumed abstract dogmatism. The irony in this is that Bonhoeffer himself had a lifelong passion for concrete expression. He studied the ins and outs of social connections. He longed to be able to communicate these to anyone, from children to prisoners. He was convinced that we meet God in that place where we are encountered by persons we can't understand. This 'practice of communal living and personal training' is Dietrich's pragmatic realization of his inner longing. He can be himself entirely for others. Through his music, cleaning the kitchen, making beds, and patiently conversing with students, he demonstrated a Christian faith that can countermand the National Socialist bastardization of all that was sacred.

The section titled "Discussion Evenings" (431) is particularly interesting as it relates to the question of Finkenwalde's stance on war. In 1935 Military Conscription had just been reintroduced and Germany was once again a world military power. When Bonhoeffer raised the issue of conscientious objection he met with heated opposition. Bonhoeffer finally succeeded in instilling in them a healthy respect for anyone refusing to fight out of obedience to Christ's command. His presumed pacifism only made his critics in the Confessing church that much more suspicious.

Bonhoeffer's friendship with Herman Stohr of Stettin, secretary of the German Fellowship of Reconciliation is also worth a mention. He defended Stohr to his students even though Stohr's own position was centered in universal disarmament rather than theology. Bonhoeffer tried unsuccessfully to save Stohr when he was later prosecuted (and then executed) as a conscientious objector.

When Karl Barth fought the oath to Hitler and lost his teaching position, it became an important object lesson at Finkenwalde. Barth’s theological reasoning made it more than a political issue. A copy of the farewell letter to Hermann Hesse was copied and distributed to the students. The final passage reflected both Bonhoeffer and Barth's sympathies on the Confessing church's selfishness at that time:

"...the Confessing church has as yet shown no sympathy for the millions who are suffering injustice. It has not once spoken out on the most simple matters of public integrity. And if and when it does speak, it is always on its own behalf."

Bethge says that rather than give Karl Barth a position at one of the Confessing church’s seminaries, many within the Confessing church were happy to see him leave at this point. (432) What happened here showed the students that there could no longer be a visible separation of Christian action from politics in the face of State incursion. Karl Barth’s request to restate his oath to say “in so far as it is possible for me as a Christian” brilliantly set forth the reign of Christ over Hitler.

There is much more in this chapter than I can possibly cover in a blog entry. The next twenty five pages covered Finkenwalde as a Spiritual Center, and descriptions of Pomerania and the Saxony province as they influenced Bonhoeffer and the school. These are followed by a lengthy description of the Syllabus (lesson plan) for students. He divides it into four sections which cover Homiletics (441-444), Ministry and Church (444-447), Confessional Writings , or the Reformation creeds from where they stood, (447-450) and then finally “Discipleship,” which of course became the book Nachfolge or (for us) the Cost of Discipleship(450-460).

It pains me not to walk through all of these, but let me point out the significance of the section Ministry and Church to our discussion of how Finkenwalde prepared its students for a Biblical outlook on war and injustice. Bethge writes:

“On the issue of the church’s legal authority Bonhoeffer taught that this could not be possessed externally, but only internally in the form of church discipline over its own members. Externally all the church could do was confess and suffer.”(444)

As I see it, this puts Finkenwalde squarely in the same place as the historic peace churches. Bonhoeffer knew that they had no legal authority within the State and that it was only a matter of time before their dangerous situation would turn deadly. Even so, as they saw it, they were compelled to faithfulness to Christ regardless of the consequences. I think we could find many more applications for our times from this section, if it were to be worked through. Much of it is legal and historical and so, any extraction has to be careful and deliberate.

All I’m going to say about the “Discipleship” section is that if Cost of Discipleship is your introduction to Bonhoeffer, you owe it to yourself to read these ten pages. I am fascinated by a friend of mine who told me recently that while he was reading Ethics, he really didn’t give a care about Bonhoeffer as a person. I knew this wasn’t strictly true as he’d devoured and loved Saints and Villains, the fictional account of his life. For the last sixty years the world has delighted in expounding on Bonhoeffer’s importance without much real knowledge of him. That might annoy me, but I can’t help but think Dietrich would be bemused by it. He was misunderstood for just about every direction he took during his life, why should it be any different after his death?

After the Syllabus section, Bethge writes about the House of Brethren. Wait a second, weren’t we talking about the Finkenwalde community already? Well, there was community at the seminary, then there’s a smaller live-in community with a more rigorous devotion to meditation and confession. These separate sections serve to highlight the content over the form. Not all the students could accept the rigorous way of life layed out in what became the book Life Together. If you want to know more about this manner and life and Bonhoeffer’s proposal to the church for its need, read about it in my article here. If you’re reading Life Together, you should read Bethge pgs. 460-472.

Within this section are some revealing insights into Bonhoeffer’s take on groups similar to American Evangelicals. Bonhoeffer spared no disdain in his regard for the Oxford Movement. (470) And his comments on Count Zinzendorf’s hymns (whom Karl Barth regarded highly) also have bearing here:

“By the time I’d finished, I felt really depressed. What a musty cellarful of piety. . . . And all this in hymns! Yes, such are people---pious people! I have a horror of the consequences of this finitum capax infiniti! We must have the pure and genuine air of the Word around us. And yet we are incapable of getting away from ourselves. But for goodness’ sake let’s turn our eyes away from ourselves!”

Maybe it is these sentiments that make me so angry when I think of Richard J. Foster’s placement of Bonhoeffer in the Holiness tradition of his book Streams of Living Water. That was a serious error in judgment that someone, maybe Martin Marty (who wrote the Foreword), should have called him on. I fear that most Evangelicals read enough of Cost of Discipleship to think Bonhoeffer is like the revivalist singer Keith Green on steroids. (That’s honestly what I thought.) Somehow they never get to the end discussion of the Lord’s Supper, or how a personal “conversion experience” is not as important as accepting the truth in faith. Bonhoeffer was no revivalist.

Let me insert a final point here on Bonhoeffer and community. Eberhard Bethge has this remark at the end of his House of Brethren section:

“When Bonhoeffer was working in Ettal at the end of 1940 he encountered the monastic wisdom of the Benedictines as one who was no stranger to it himself. Biographically the time of community life was over, but this was not so in practice. In 1943 and 1944, when he was compelled to lead a cruelly lonely existence, the exercises he had practiced in Finkenwalde proved an invaluable solace, and made him frank and open-minded toward his agnostic fellow sufferers.”

At some point I would love to write a full paper that explores Bonhoeffer’s interest in community from Sanctorum Communio up to the end. Or at least I think someone should. It would take into account his large family, his earliest ecclesiology, its development in his theological sociality (as Clifford Green points out) through to its realization in Finkenwalde, the Collective Vicorates and then finally in his relation to his fellow prisoners. Here’s a brief chronology of Bonhoeffer’s continued use of Meditation, Lectio Divina and Confession up to the end:

1935-1937 Finkenwalde

1938-1940 Collective Vicorates (Life Together published in 1939)

1940 Benedictine monastery at Ettal

1943-1944 we know he continued to practice in prison.

Community always had a distinctive place in Bonhoeffer’s faith. To claim that Finkenwalde was a failed experiment or of little consequence to his students and himself after it was closed is an obvious conjecture from ignorance. Its sad that more folks can’t get the full picture beyond the simple outline of Life Together. I guess there’s far too much reading involved.

The Ecumenical World (472-486)
To summarize this section, Bonhoeffer gets edged out of his youth conference work because of he wanted to further the topics of conscienscious objection and use of coercion and its rights and limitations. He is pushed out in favor of an American(!), Eugene Espy, who quickly makes it known that they’ve gotten rid of Bonhoeffer and will gladly follow Geneva’s plan. From this point on Berlin and Geneva enjoy normal (German Christian) relations (476-8). The Chamby conference fully recognized the German Church entourage headed by Bishop Heckel. Bethge says Heckel “had the field to himself.” On the Jewish question Heckel lied that “it was being dealt with much more openly and that plans in hand were on the way to fulfillment.” Now don’t those “reassuring words” sound downright ominous?

Bishop Bell raised Fano’s resolution again to maintain close fellowship with the Confessing Church and Heckel replied that of course Fano was still good---yeah, right.

This follows with a lengthy review of Bonhoeffer’s essay “The Confessing Church and the Ecumenical Movement.” Here’s the final statement from this essay:

“He concluded the essay by asking whether an ecumenical council would ‘speak a word of judgment about war, race hatred and social exploitation, whether, through such true ecumenical unity among Protestant Christians of all nations, war itself will one day become impossible. What is demanded is not the realizations of our own aims but obedience.’” (Bethge, 485)

For Bonhoeffer, in view of the times, this word of judgment gave the work its legitimacy.

The Steglitz Resolutions (486-491)
Shortly after the Nuremberg laws of 15 September, Bonhoeffer’s old friend Franz Hildebrandt called to sound an alarm regarding resolutions to be decided in Steglitz. He warned of the possibility of the council adopting a measure that winked at the new laws and the Aryan clause. He warned that if this happened he would leave the Confessing church. So Bonhoeffer and the entire seminary went to the meetings and sat in the balcony. They heckled the Reich representative before and after his speech on finances. In spite of their pressure, Steglitz tabled the Aryan clause issue while affirming a comment on the rights of Jews to be baptized. This was an embarrassment. Bonhoeffer left Steglitz very depressed. He’d just received a letter from his grandmother about the plight of his twin sister’s Jewish family.

The End of the first Finkenwalde course:
Ordinands returned to their home churches to be soon ordained, but as “illegals.” Hardly any could expect a regular pastorate with a nice house and garden. If they’d wanted that, Finkenwalde was the wrong seminary! The German Christian consistories barred anyone from seminaries of the Councils of Brether from a regular, salaried ministry. Instead they had the following options:

They could find an independent patron with limited funding from the Council. The could get an assistant pastorate, which surely meant permanent apprenticeship. One of the new congregations could call them to fight for use of a church and building. Finally, they could travel and form emergency churches in private homes which Bethge notes, was becoming much more dangerous.

Dietrich Bonhoeffer promised to continue supporting them with letters, visits, and informal study conferences.

Finally, let me point to a theme recurrent in much of the material that I glossed over:

Bonhoeffer was torn between the reality of what he’d begun and what it had become. He sought for Action from the Confessing Church on behalf of the Jews. He sought for legitimacy, representation and action from the Ecumenical delegations on behalf of the Confessing Church. He never stopped believing in the power of the true Church to act. He never lost faith in the use of theology to accomplish all this. He did this knowing that the whole situation was changing and that everything he worked for would likely be lost. Even so he tried to act quickly with the resources he still had.

Tags: Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Eberhard Bethge, 1935, Finkenwalde, community, Franz Hildebrandt, Karl Barth, Andre Trocme, Le Chambon-sur-Lignon

"Daddy You're such a Nerd!"

While working on my Bethge blog chapter nine, my daughter Gabrielle interrupted me to help her with her homeschool studies. She asked what a pledge was. The sentence in her book said, "We pledge allegiance to this ____." and then showed a cartoon of a Christian flag, you know, the white one with the blue box in the corner and the red cross on it. So I started describing what a pledge was--- in that sense. I went on and on for maybe five minutes. She got that glazed look in her eye, saw what I was pointing to, wrote in the word "flag" and then smiled and said, "Daddy you're such a nerd! You talk soooo much." To which I replied, "Well, I'll just take my nerdy self and slink back to my room." BTW, in her school she doesn't pledge allegiance to the American flag or the Christian flag. That's why she didn't know what a pledge was.

Tags: pledge, flag, allegiance, nerd, daddy

disclaimer: this is still a family site

Ok, let me just add a disclaimer here that the Flogging Molly DVD should definitely be rated R for language. If you're a youth pastor please don't show it to your group of sixteen year olds upon my recommendation. I've been watching the whole thing on my laptop with headphones.

more on the Flogging Molly film

"When my father died, which was probably the most traumatic thing, we'd one window in the flat. He was sitting at the table there on a Sunday. The sun was shining through the window and it hit him on the face. And he was yellow. I thought it was really funny. I thought it was great. I said "Hey dad, you're yellow!" Alright? And that was the last time I ever seen him. My mother went outside. She went down the street and she called an ambulance. The ambulance came and picked him up and that was the last time I'd ever seen him. He died. Cancer. He was jaundiced at the time. The next time I'd seen him was in his coffin. So. . . I thought it was my fault that he died. If I hadn't have said anything he would still be alive, I thought. So for years I used to lie all the f***ing time. I was terrified to tell the truth. 'Cuz if I told the truth something bad would happen."

Dave King, songwriter, Flogging Molly. "Whiskey On A Sunday" A Jim Dziura Film.

This quote is an example of the kind of transparency, truth-telling, and lust for life that typifies this band film. Its truly rare that a touring band could love each other so much, be tight as family, truly respect each other and believe in their craft so much. That's what I get out of this film. Its truly inspiring. Dave King writes songs worth singing. His stories are alive and real. They're about real people and real human need. I can't believe how familial this film gets without getting into sentimental drivel. Here's a hard living, hard drinking rock band that clearly hasn't fallen prey to the excesses of that lifestyle.

Tags: Flogging Molly film, "Whiskey on Sunday", quote

Flogging Molly and the death of the Electric Car

Flogging Molly restored my faith in Irish music. I'd heard so much crappy traditional Irish music over a short period of time that I swore off altogether and went straight Bluegrass. Then my friend Jason passed me a Flogging Molly cd. I watched the first half of the Whisky on a Sunday DVD last night. Its one of the more fun "life on the road" biopics I've seen.

Then yesterday I got to see half of "Who Killed the Electric Car?" Why can't I seem to watch a movie straight through lately? Family. Oh well, that's the beauty of DVD players. You must see "Who Killed the Electric Car?" I found it on Youtube, then I went to the website, and now that its out on DVD my dad bought it. He immediately loaned it out so I can't see the whole thing until next week. Anyway, this documentary is the thrilling love story between EV1 owners (leasees) and the car owner, General Motors. Its the story of California politics and the loss of a clean air mandate. Its the story of a corporate product being so good for the public that the owner gets scared and rips it from their hands. Fascinating stuff.

But of course the larger story is about an American coal and oil based infrastructure fighting to keep its archaic claws on the hapless populace.
(How's that for a movie tag line?)

Tags: Flogging Molly, Irish music, "Who Killed the Electric Car?", film, EV1 leasees, GM, coal, oil, infrastructure

Between posts

I continue to work through chapter nine of Bethge's Dietrich Bonhoeffer: A Biography. I have a few paragraphs written for a post but I keep editing and deleting and rewording. Sunday morning I got hit with the writing bug. Then Monday and Tuesday my sisters came to town with their families and we've been going over to my mom's to be with them each day. Yesterday morning I finally got out on a nice long walk down a beautiful stretch of rural road. Manuevering down a hilly blacktop takes a lot of concentration! With Lucinda William's "Car Wheels on a Gravel Road" on my ipod I briskly walked and ran for a straight hour. I got better exercise than my typical six mile walk along the bike path in Chicago. The change of scenery was a welcome treat. Beautiful skies, stars at night, hilly pastures, its all a luxury I wish I could take home. I'll be traveling with my dad and daughters today. I plan to bring along DB and a notebook. We'll see how far I get.

I just have to say that while DB has been one of my most richly rewarding reads its also the most work I've ever put into a single book. Maybe a better mind than mine wouldn't find it this hard, but I spend a lot of time working the angles. I read and reread a lot. This is a book I'll no doubt continue to struggle along with for years to come. The reading and plodding really stretch my mind into new places. Its like mental weight lifting. Trouble comes in finding other folks who can really share my interest in the material. I have met exactly one other person this year who has been entirely through this book. I met him by chance in a bookstore over the summer. If you've been all the way through DB, chime in here too.

Tags: walking, reading, Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Eberhard Bethge, Lucinda Williams

A lesson that's not necessarily rational

One of the toughest things about raising kids is imparting simple advice concerning control over the emotions. That sentence is enough to make you wonder what sort of parent I am. Let me break it down.

No one can make me rageful. No one can make me wallow in self-pity. No one can make me live in fear. These are all personal choices. But they don't feel that way. Helping my daughter understand that her brother and sister will do things that seem unfair but that she controls her own jealousy and self pity is something we revisit repeatedly. I can't expect her to one day get "rational" in that regard.

Now let me go from the particular to the general, theologically speaking. Sometimes those of us who read theology with peculiar interest tend to look for rational seams in everything. We don't understand why "those" people can't "get it." Biblically speaking, we humans haven't been getting it since the Fall in Genesis 3! The people of God's covenant weren't being rational in disobeying God. There were plenty of reasonable paths they could have chosen. But alas, the Scriptures are record of God's lovely and "irrational" patience for millenia.

I was reading some Lee Strobel The Case for Christ last night. What irks me about his books is not that he makes faith reasonable and rational. Its the assumption that a reasonable and rational faith is an easy faith to accept and live. Jesus is a historical figure, ergo, His claims are true, er go, the only reasonable choice is to become a Christian, er go all my life's yearnings will be fulfilled. Choosing to take up your cross and follow Jesus is a bodily action, not a philosophical decision. Now of course the mind is part of the body, but a lived faith is not something just anyone should claim to have.

I am on the way. I do not possess Christ. I am part of a lived faith that I embody along with other Christians.

Tags: Reason, children, faith, Scripture, Lee Strobel, The Case for Christ

update from Nixa (or Strafford) Missouri

Life is much slower down here in Nixa Missouri. I'm learning to adjust. I still have internet access and can continue blogging but even my internet connection is slower. The real adjustment is with continuing our kids' education while we're gone. Between blogging I'm watching Alathea so that Martha can school the older kids. I long to continue work on my memoirs and spend time playing those Johnny Cash hymns I typed out earlier. They're simple songs and beautiful to play and sing aloud. Today we'll be over at my mom's house in Marshfield raking and bagging leaves. I'll post some pictures of this later. I took my mom grocery shopping and to the post office a few days ago. I think of simple things like this as spiritual exercise. I'm divesting myself of my hurried tendencies, trying to live each moment at a time and value each shared moment with my mom, dad, or kids for the worth they assign them. In that way I learn the true worth myself. I'm not as smart as I think. I have so much to learn about the unhurried simplicity of life.

Tags: reflections, family

I posted a couple vids of the kids playing in the leaves on my Wordpress site.. I said we're located in Nixa but we're commuting back and forth between Nixa and Northview/Marshfield. Two access roads and the interstate make the trip about a half hour each way.

Help in posting comments

My sister told me today that she'd tried to post comments to a few of my posts and had a hard time. Here's the trick (I think). If you're a blogger user you need to log in first before filling in the comment box. This seems to be the case on Beta Blogger blogs. I forget this all the time too. Anyway, log in, then comment. If I don't post your comment within a few days, email me. It may have gotten lost or something.

Tags: comments, Beta Blogger, log in

Three new Johnny Cash Videos

Here they are in the order I personally feel they should be viewed in. I think the second is the weakest personally, but you decide.

Tags: Johnny Cash, videos, American V, Rick Rubin, Help Me, God's Gonna Cut You Down

more on the BBC JC in San Quentin Documentary

Over on the Johnny Cash forum someone pointed out that the new documentary doesn't include the full concert. In fact the concert may have been filmed with only the documentary in mind. So when Johnny was pulling all his stunts with the cameraman during the concert they wouldn't have used that anyway.

Johnny Cash: Live at San Quentin

Wow! Well I know what I want for Christmas this year. The three disc set of Johnny Cash: Live at San Quentin. I can't believe they released the documentary filmed for the BBC. Rumor had it it was lost for all time! There is a clip available on Johnny's myspace page. Also on the page are three music videos from his new album. Good stuff.

response on Wordpress

The illustrious, flawless, indefatigable Wordpress.com just gave me this response:

Server Maintenance

Your server is going through a few minutes of routine maintenance. Please don't touch your browser for a few minutes.

What do I do?

• If you were posting a comment or making a post on your blog then do not press BACK on your browser. Wait 5 minutes and press the refresh icon on your browser. Your comment or post will be sent as normal.
• If you are browsing a blog here just wait a few moments and hit refresh. The page you were expecting will appear.

Please do not hit the BACK button on your browser!

Tags: wordpress.com, error